You’re allowed to feel good no matter what conditions are present.
What do you believe determines how you feel? People often believe that it is their current or past conditions that determine emotion. It is believed that you have to or simply do feel a certain way based on your conditions, and if you feel good while your condition don’t seem to support it, that something must be wrong with you. In other words, there is a common misconception that emotion is determined by OUTSIDE factors. When someone is in a bad mood they often blame someone or something for it, instead of realizing that it is the MEANING behind it that is responsible. Emotion is determined by your beliefs, your stories, what you are saying and believing. It is a choice.
You can feel good no matter what your current conditions may be. Whether you have conditions you want to continue, or conditions you would like to change, you can feel good right now.
Why is this so important? You will have a difficult time changing your current conditions or even knowing what you want from a negative emotional state or by simply looking only at your current conditions. When you feel negative emotion, it is an indicator that you have a desire for an improved condition but a belief that is in opposition to it. You are meant to feel it, take note of what you would like to change or happen or have, then take new ACTION. In simpler terms, your negative emotion is meant to be felt and utilized as FEEDBACK.
There is no condition that warrants continuously feeling bad.
No condition warrants you continually feeling bad, as negative emotion is meant to be felt and utilized as feedback. You don’t feel bad because the condition is so bad that you should…you feel bad because of the story you’re telling about it and because you haven’t decided to focus on what you now want. Well, if you keep focusing on that what ISN’T working, the negative emotion simply gets stronger and stronger and nothing changes. The best way to avoid this is to get ahead of it in the first place, to understand what negative emotion really means and to re-focus and take new action once you feel the negative emotion. You have make new decisions and tell better-feeling stories when you experience negative emotion, as the goal is not to tolerate feeling bad or blame conditions. You ALWAYS have a choice to shift your thinking and experience new emotions. Sometimes a change in conditions is the result, sometimes it means making peace with uncontrollable conditions.
But what if it already has momentum?
While it is good to know what to do moving forward, how do you deal with negative emotion that already has momentum? Get into problem SOLVING mode.
- See it as it is, but not worse than it is. This is also known as making peace with what is.
- Now, see it BETTER than it is. What do you WANT? What is it your negative emotion is trying to show you? What are you believing that is no longer true or never was?
- Now allow it to be the way you see it. Shift your beliefs to support what you do want and what is true for you.
Power of choice.
No matter what has happened in our lives we always have one power that can change everything; the power of choice. We can choose what we focus on, what meaning we give to things, and what path we take. It is these choices, not our conditions, that determine the quality of our lives.
When conditions are unfavorable you can choose how it will impact you life. How are you going to turn it around? Will you let it overwhelm you or transform you? It’s all in your decision regarding its meaning.
Positive thinking + action
In order for something to change you have to get out of your own head. You can not just think to yourself, it isn’t there, it isn’t happening, it isn’t happening. You must first SEE IT AS IT IS, but not WORSE than it is. Accept it. Then you must SEE it better than it is. What do you want it to look like. Then allow it to be that way. Take the action, shift the belief.
In order to thrive in any situation you must have psychological strength. You already have this inside of you, you just have to allow it and utilize the power of your own focus. This is what allows you to thrive in any condition instead of allowing the environment control you. Master the strength inside of yourself and nothing can stop you.
Throw away your old stories and old blueprints. Decide now how you want to live your life. Create your own standard for yourself and commit to it.