Dana GattoGuilt ridden to free.
Guilt…one of the worst feeling emotions.
I’ve lived life with a lot of guilt.
I took on a lot of projections and made them my reality.
I held onto the past and things I did when I wasn’t in a good place.
Instead of asking is this true?
Was that my intention? Am I wrong?
What do I want to do differently moving forward?
And when I didn’t believe I was wrong, I turned to anger.
Guilt is an emotion we feel when we’re told what we did was wrong or bad.
Anger is an emotion we feel when our value system or boundaries have been crossed.
With a healthy mindset when we feel guilt we ask ourselves is what I did against my value system? Or is it against someone else’s?
With a healthy mindset when we’re angry we ask ourselves how have my boundaries or values been crossed? Where do I need to change them or create them moving forward?
There’s a big difference between holding into it and processing it to learn what to do moving forward.
When you feel guilt and want to make a different decision next time, you decide that is what you’ll do and you change.
If it wasn’t something you believe is against your value system, but instead something that feels true for you…you can’t take on the guilt someone else wants you to and you don’t want to also get stuck in anger.
In essence…if guilt is motivated by your own self, you can make changes and do something different.
If it isn’t, don’t take on the guilt or belief you’re wrong.
Some people will want to hold you in the place where you “messed up.”
But if you’ve made changes and you’re truly sorry…you can’t let someone continue to guilt you or throw their anger at you.
And that most important someone is you.
You have to let it go so you can move forward and be who you are now.
If you live in guilt, you’ll feel stuck.
It’s the opposite of freedom.
If you continually bring up something someone did after they’ve apologized AND made changes, you are holding onto anger that’s holding you back.
If there was no change, it’s up to you to create the boundary you need and take action to line yourself up with people who match your value system. To continue to live in alignment with your values and let go of the anger.
Guilt and anger can become a ping pong that hurts everyone.
Releasing yourself from guilt, making the changes, and letting yourself benefit from who you’ve become is what growth is.
It’s how you take yourself and your life to the place you want to be right now.
Guilt should never be something you live in or with.
Anger should never be something you live in or with.
Learn from it, make the internal changes, and let it go.
That’s true freedom.
Do you hold onto anger or guilt? Is it holding you down?
If the answer is yes, it’s time to work through it so you can experience the happiness, authenticity, and success that is available for you right now.
XO,
Dana
