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You Have To Become What You Want To Have

how to have a great relationship

Is there something you want in your life and you just can’t seem to get it? To have it? To become it? If so, there is a very good chance that the reason lies in who you believe yourself to be.

You see, you have to think like the person you want to be. If you want to be wealthy you have to think as if you’re already wealthy. You can’t think about how you don’t have enough money to pay your bills. You can’t think about how people with money are greedy and awful people. You have to think like someone who is wealthy. Pay attention to how they talk about money. Pay attention to how they think about money. You have to feel good about money in order to have all the wealth that you desire. If money or wealthy people strike a chord within you, why would you ever want to become one of “those” people or have that thing that feels so bad when you think about it.

If you want to be in a good relationship you have to think like someone who is in a great relationship. How would you view your partner. What kinds of things would you do for them? Would you be complaining about how they don’t ever do anything for you? How would you feel about them and how would you feel about yourself in that relationship? Would you be holding back or giving all you’ve got? You have to feel good about relationships in order to have the one you really want. If you don’t feel good about relationships, how can you attract a great one and how do you expect to experience the best version of them?

If you want to be fit and healthy you have to think like someone who is fit and healthy, not someone who’s unhealthy and overweight. You have to act like them. You have to think like them. You have to be like them regarding health and fitness. Do they eat whatever they want as much as they want or do they pay attention to what foods work for their body? Did they find an exercise regimen that works for them and consistently do it? Do they make excuses? Or do they do what it takes and enjoy it? You have to feel good about healthy and fit people if you want to become one. You can’t hate on them. You can’t assume it is easier for them. You can’t think they must just have more time, more money, none of that is accurate. While they may in fact have more money or time than you, that has nothing to do with their health and fitness.

You may have attached a specific person or traits or even a painful situation to something you really want. Money is not that greedy sales person you encountered. All relationships are not that one who treated you terrible or the one you grew up watching. All fit people are not egotistical. These are just some examples of beliefs people may have about things they really do want, but by believing negative things about them…they block them from their own life.
Remember, if you believe it, it is.

So let’s break it down into dollars. Break it down into what you want in a relationship. Break it down to what you want to look like physically and what level of health you want to achieve. These do not include people you have encountered or unwanted circumstances, just things you want. Separate what you want from the story you have been telling. You can have, be or do anything, you just have to believe it.

In any moment you are either allowing or disallowing what you want. And you are doing this by thinking about what you want and why you want it or by thinking about what you don’t want and why you don’t want it. You can know which you are actually doing by asking yourself how you feel. If you feel bad, you are thinking either about what you do not want or coming up with reasons why you don’t want something. If you feel good you are thinking about what you do want and why you do want it.

This is why emotion is so important. Sometimes you think you’re thinking about what you want, but actually you are thinking about the absence of it. Paying attention to emotion will allow you to know which of these two things you are actually doing.

How would you think if everything was the way you wanted it? How would you feel? This is the question to ask yourself and when you know the answer, work on feeling that way.

You’ve got this!

XO,

Dana

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